Planning their wedding can be very stressful for an engaged couple and can even take its toll on their relationship. This is especially true when the future bride and groom are not getting any support from their families and friends. In order to mitigate these undesirable consequences, parents can provide any form of assistance to their children to lighten their burden and make wedding planning easier and more romantic.
Here are three things that the parents of the bride and groom can do for their children:
- Remember that the wedding is not about you.
Some parents can be overly eager to help out that they forget that this isn’t about them. Sure, you made a significant financial contribution and the couple appreciates that. Did you get them handmade jewellery Brisbane couples can buy from Ringleaders? Even if you are paying for the wedding, keep in mind that it is not your wedding but your daughter’s or your son’s. Let them plan it the way they dream their perfect wedding to be. If your own parents or your in-laws interfered when you planned your own wedding many years ago, remember how you felt then. We know you wouldn’t want your children to resent you for meddling too much on their affairs.
- Be honest and direct about financial contributions.
While parents are not obliged to contribute to their daughter’s or son’s wedding, you can still offer monetary assistance to your children. Many engaged couples are already financially able to carry the weight of wedding costs but any financial assistance they will receive will be greatly appreciated, particularly if they are on a tight budget.
Don’t wait for them to ask you. As parents, initiate the conversation about making contributions to their celebration. If you are giving money, make sure you are clear about the conditions of your funding. How much will you give? Are you giving the money as a wedding gift or as a loan? With the former, there is no expectation for repayment so it will be less stressful on the couple. The latter has a responsibility associated with it that the soon-to-be bride and groom can choose to accept or decline. Do not feel bad if the couple refuses to accept your offer because they may have other financial considerations as well.
In the same way, if you are unable to make a monetary contribution, let them know. Your child and their life partner will understand. It is likely that they are aware of your financial status and have anticipated this as well. Your honesty about your ability to contribute will help the couple better plan their wedding because now they already have a clearer budget. Also, in lieu of contributions in cash, you can always offer yourself or your expertise for their special day.
- Offer your help as often as necessary.
In this stressful time, couples would greatly benefit from the assistance and support of family and friends. Check in on the couple every now and then so you can help address conundrums with your wisdom. Mothers of brides particularly need to have their maternal instincts and comforting words ready for bridezilla moments.
Your opinions as parents will also have a substantial impact on the couple, so make sure you are careful with what you want to say during these very sensitive times – from the wedding preparations up to the wedding day. From avoiding familial conflicts to delivering great wedding toasts and speeches and being in your best behaviour are just some expectations of the soon-to-be bride and groom toward their parents.
Ann-Marie x
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*This article is published in a partnership of Mediabuzzer
